Saying Goodbye... Again

Goodbyes are something I hate... yet I've said so many lately. and so many hello's and now I'm having to say goodbye to so many of my new hello's.
Terry has been really sweet with all of this... a couple of weeks ago I called him and he answered "Hey Beautiful". I'm glad we are still close, after all the time and distance. After I told him what was going on at work yesterday, he told me to break my lease and move back home. lol. But then I wouldn't be a badass!@
My principal planned to call the parents of all of my students today, so he told me I could tell them. I was eager to tell them, because I felt like I was hiding it. I had no idea what I was in for!
I sat them down and we did calendar and shared reading. I had 2 kids at speech, and I wanted to wait for them before I told them, but I couldn't. I began by asking "So do you guys know how sometimes things happen and we just don't like them but can't do a thing about them?" and they were like yeah, and I got several examples, about deaths in families... Hmmm... I said "How about... has anyone ever had to move and it upset you?" and that sparked some conversation. They kids listened attentively as I choked up while telling them I was leaving.  Their faces were incredible. They literally looked like I probably did when I was told what happened. One little girl immediately had red eyes, and within 2 minutes, quiet tears down her face. Another girl said "This is the worst birthday ever!" (It was her birthday.) I was totally unprepared for the tears, actually, bawling, that happened. Not all of them. One kid said "YESSSSS!" lol. And my usual chatters were going on and on, and my little impulsive puppy who spins around in his chair goes, "Don't you guys get it???? She's LEAVING! she won't be our teacher anymore!" And then burst into tears.
When the two got back from speech, I told them. The little girl seemed unphased. The little boy looked like he might cry. I asked, "Is there anything you'd like to say?" He looked at me with his sweet little red eyes and said, "Yeah.... Bye!"
It was a very uncomfortable, unexpected time for me. I did not expect the drama and tears from them. Some of my girls came up and hugged me and wouldn't let go. Some of it was drama but some was genuine hurt.. a couple kids wouldn't stop bawling. The little girl whose birthday it was was devastated, clearly. It broke my heart. I had decided I was going to let them write or draw a picture about their feelings, etc., and I said, "Ok, what do you guys want to do now?" And a little girl said, "I want you to stay here and be our teacher...," so that threw me for a loop... and so began "free-choice time," the only way I could get all but 2 kids to stop crying. Many drew giant faces with tears on them. Others drew pictures of themselves for me and wrote "I love you." Another smiled and drew a picture of his family. I tried to get the kids thinking differently... that we still had 2 days together... and that they were going to get to have a new, fun teacher... Kids are so resilient. Within about an hour, they were chatting about a new classroom and who would go where and what that would be like. I tried so hard to get them thinking positively, then it stung a little when they seemed excited. Lol. Not really but yeah ok really.
But all in all, today proved to me how much of a difference teachers can make in kids' lives... in less than 3 weeks. The impact this school and students have made on me has been infinite. I will take it with me wherever I go (and I'm NOT going back to Indiana.)